The Point of Marriage


What's the point of marriage? What's the point of a civil union? What's the point of finding that one person (or multiple) to spend your life with?

Here's a scenario: you're walking through a forest. It's just non-stop walking. The sun can blind you at times. The wind can be fierce at times. Pollen can be so thick in the air and just irritates your eyes. Your feet start to throb after awhile. It's super tough to remain strong for such a long time without something to lean on or against, maybe even sit down on. You find a solid rock. You can sit on it. It blocks you from some of the wind. At the right angles, it can even block the sun. The rock allows you to be vulnerable yet at the same time supports you. However, if you sit on it too long, it might hurt your bum. You aren't mad at the rock for being too hard and hurting your bum. You actually are thankful because it allowed you to rest and be vulnerable for awhile.

That's marriage. That's what we strive for. We are forever looking for that person that allows us to be vulnerable. It's safe to be vulnerable at times. It's rough having to be strong all of the time. Strong for our family, strong for our friends, strong for work, strong enough to have to be an adult. We need that person to protect us when we fall down. We need that person to tell us that it's going to be alright. We need that person who will love us anyway when we are wearing our ugly cry face and can't move for a day.

However, we also need to return the favor. There seems to be a pattern that once people are married, they have to maintain this perfect persona or their partner will think less of them. How much strain can that thought process bring to a marriage? WE as a species need to change our thoughts around this. Embrace the little moments of vulnerability, that makes us human. That also means that no one is perfect (or that we are all perfectly imperfect). It gives all of us a common ground.

We should be able to be vulnerable with our significant others. That should be the one person where it's safe to do so. Support each other through this period of vulnerability and rise up together and stronger.

#fear #relationship #growth #marriage

©2018-2020 by Mel the Coach, Mt Washington, KY